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Two Men and a Baby

Us with the baby So a few days ago I got a letter from two of my favorite people in the world with a picture of me, Dan and the their baby together. I don’t know why but seeing us with the baby has actually done something to me. I’m not saying I want one or even entertaining the idea of getting one in the next 5 years but it is a nice thought. We’ve been together for almost 7 years now and you get to a point in a relationship where you start thinking about this sort of stuff.

I use to think stuff like wanting a baby or even a marriage was the “playing straight” thing but now that I’m getting older I realize it is about creating a life with someone you love (oh god, did I just type that shit…).

Either way, I’m excited to be the baby’s “guncle” with Dan and just having this picture on our fridge gives me a daily reminder of what is important in life.

Panic on the Streets of NOLA

Rue Bourbon

People throw up a lot here.

So, I’m in my bathroom and out of the blue I had the worst panic attack of my life. I can’t even remember when the last time I had a panic attack but there I was sitting on my bathroom floor thinking that my body was overheating while my cats stared aimlessly at me.  After being nudged a few times, I stood up and made my way to my bedroom and just collapsed  and panted heavily. Dan, calm and collected as always, told me to breathe while he got me something to drink. Twenty minutes and a orange Powerade later, I’m fine. 

The funny thing is I don’t remember what caused me to have a panic attack. It could be the medical journal I was reading but I assume it is financial stress. I’m not in the poor house but I feel like I’m barely making ends meet and while Dan, by way of his family, seems to have an endless cash reserve, I’m not so fortunate. I’m just glad my taxes are paid, my student loan has a low interest rate, and my credit limit is minimal, or I could be in an even worse position right now. I could have been in my bathroom with the lights out cutting myself to Morrissey. How dreadful.