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In Other News: ITZ HAWT AZ HALE N DIS BISH!

So I’m watching the news and the meteorologist says “Where’s summer”? It is fucking 91 degrees and this coonass, po’dunk asshole wants to know where summer is? I knew when I moved here there would be days like this but I never knew it would be when I have to actually go outside and do my daily routine of going to work, walking to Greek Cafe for lunch, and taking the mutha fuckin’ streetcar home. The heat here just make you so lethargic and not want to do anything but lay around or go play in a fucking water hydrant, which I wouldn’t do because it’s New Orleans and nobody does that here anymore…(Where have all the ghetto people gone? Atlanta? Houston?). I really miss being able to go swimming whenever I want in the summer. That is the one thing I will not deprive myself of once I’m a proper adult (Dan and I need a house near a large body of water that is not the Mississippi or above-ground pool). I know I descend from people who are generally use to heat but omigawd I fucking hate it when the mercury rising above 80. It just feels so overpowering (and to think I want to spend a year in Brazil next year) and all I want to do is bitch and complain about everything everyone does.

Also this old ass dude (and I mean epically ancient) invited Dan to this “country club” and it’s a fucking old dude bathroom. Who cover up the nastiness of a bathroom by adding the words “country club” to it. I really have no urge to go to Carrollton Station anymore (I’m going to miss Andy and Hilary) knowing that ol’ dude will be there. It is just too much anxiety and awkwardness revisiting a situation like that. Urgh and he told Dan his last relationship there was a 40 year difference and I immediately said “Was he a hundred?”I know that is a dick way to respond but come the fuck on. He opened the door with the nude “country club” comment. I got us a free drink though…

Oh, oh guess what?!! I’m going to do my stand up! I’m basically doing it to prove to this guy named Rosenberg that I’m funnier than he is. I know this sounds like a Frat Pack movie but no I’m really am going to do this just to prove I’m funnier. You know what? I hope I fail miserably so I have something to write about.

I’m going to watch “I Know Who Killed Me” so expect a Hohan post soon. I saw Juno last night with Dan and honestly we both though it was kind of cliche and boring. Juno’s dialogue was like a 80’s baby hipster wrote it and omigawd what was with the “Thundercats, Ho!” comment? Like a fucking 16 year old preggo would know who they were. I was just completely underwhelmed.

For everyone’s information the “What So Farce?” is exactly what I wanted. I know I’m not using the word “Farce” correctly but I did it because it sounded like “fierce” and I’m obsessed with ONTD love for Joker.

Cheers darlings.

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