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I said “Sir let’s go east” and he listened obediently.

So I’m heading back to Atlanta today. I had a dream about it which involved bugs and spyware being attached to clothes. The bugs are probably all the thinking I’ve been doing about my personal black bug room. I’m so tired of thinking about all those dirty little bugs in my room. The spyware reference is from an earlier dream but I still do not understand what it means. I wish I could recall more but it is fading even as I type. I think I’ll be ok anyway and I will just smile because I know all the world will be going to work in China soon.

I keep thinking about this quote from Woody Allen “Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances of a date on Saturday night”. Why it is on my mind I have no clue, I think I’m done with my sexual adventures into Girl-World. I usually don’t like my vacations there and I always find myself walking the long way home on the way back. Jade and I were talking about bisexuals and I said I would date one because I am one in essence I guess but now I’m no longer sure. They are so rubbery and usually snap at you when they are being pulled too far from their natural state. I need to retain this memory. The bisexual has to return to whatever orignal shape or form after being deformed or altered and that is a highly painful activity which hurts all those involved. I don’t know where I’m going with this thought anymore but looking out the window seeing trees swaying and they seem to be glowing the most beautiful color green I have ever seen. When I was a child my mom would tell my sister and I about polar oppositions and the color wheel. She encouraged us to look at each other’s auras to make sense of the world more easily and realize when something has be shifted in our brains. I believed this for a very long time, I had faith in the unknown unlike anyone I’ve ever meet save my grandfather. Where did that faith go? Where did my childhood beliefs go? When did I become fixed like everyone else in society? Was it him? Was it all of the hims? I don’t know but as my last post for some time I have realized I have not learned anything since I have come to Georgia besides how to lose myself in vanity and falsehoods such as love and longing. Those are all manufactured feelings whose base neuro-chemicals react violently when mixed together. Why can’t those feelings just be simply like the color green or the smell of grass? Why can’t I just be simple again?

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